How to let go

Just fired your agent and want to soften the news with a nice letter of recommendation? Here are some suggestions.

For the chronically absent:
"A man like him is hard to find."
"It seemed her career was just taking off."

For the office drunk:
"I feel his real talent is wasted here."
"We generally found him loaded with work to do."
"Every hour with him was a happy hour."

For an agent with no ambition:
"He could not care less about the number of hours he had to put in."
"You would indeed be fortunate to get this person to work for you."

For an agent who is so unproductive that the job is better left unfilled:
"I can assure you that no person would be better for the job."

For an agent who is not worth further consideration as a job candidate:
"I would urge you to waste no time in making this candidate an offer of
employment."
"All in all, I cannot say enough good things about this candidate or
recommend him too highly."

For a stupid agent:
"There is nothing you can teach a man like him."
"I most enthusiastically recommend this candidate with no qualifications
whatsoever."

For a dishonest agent:
"Her true ability was deceiving."
"He's an unbelievable worker."

The Devil made me do it!

I have to pass this on.

The Devil tells a real estate agent, "Look, I can make you richer, more famous, and more successful than any real estate agent alive. In fact, I can make you the greatest agent that ever lived."

"Well," says the real estate agent, "what do I have to do in return?"

The Devil smiles, "Well, of course you have to give me your soul," he says, "but you also have to give me the souls of your children, the souls of your children's children and, as a matter of fact, you have to give me the souls of all your descendants throughout eternity."

"Wait a minute," the real estate agent says cautiously, "What's the catch?"